Introduction

Ever feel like your future self is a complete stranger? Putting off important stuff like saving money or staying healthy is easy because we don’t feel connected to our future selves. We assume we'll be the same person, so we don’t commit to actions that’ll benefit us later.

Understanding the Disconnect Between Current and Future You

I totally get it—I used to see my future self as someone completely different. It felt natural to procrastinate on things that would benefit me later. But then I tried Hal Hershfield’s* powerful method of writing letters to my future self, and it really helped bridge that gap. Here’s how it works.

Step-by-Step Guide to Writing Letters to Your Future Self

Step 1: Write a Letter from Current You to Future You

Think about your health, happiness, finances, housing, relationships, or whatever matters most to you. Write down your thoughts, goals, and hopes for the future. Here’s how I started mine:

Dear Future Laura,

What AI Imagines I will look like when I’m 80!

In 6,209 days, I’ll be you. (That’s 144,672 hours, by the way). I want to let you know what’s going on now so you can understand how you got where you are. I’ve made some big lifestyle changes that I hope benefit you. I’m sorry for the impulsive purchases and the clutter I’ve accumulated. I bet you wish you had all that money for more meaningful causes. I also hope my gamble of not having long-term care insurance paid off.

Step 2: Write a Letter from Future You to Current You

Picture yourself at a future age—maybe 80, like I did. Write back to your current self, giving advice and reflections on what you wish you had done differently or what you’re grateful for. Here’s what I wrote:

Dear Current You,

If you only realized how quickly 6,209 days fly by, I think you’d make some changes. You might reconsider spending so much time on your phone or watching mindless shows. Appreciate each day and act with urgency. Don’t sell yourself short—what you can do now will be much harder in the future. Push yourself a little harder with your strength training. Make the effort to go places. Put more effort into being mindful. And take the time to have some FUN!!!!

Step 3: Reflect on What You Learned

Taking the time to write these letters can be really eye-opening. Here's what I learned from the exercise:

Urgency and Appreciation: Writing to my future self made me realize how precious time is. I now try to appreciate each day more and make the most of my time.
Health and Well-being: My future self reminded me how important it is to stay healthy. I've started pushing myself harder with strength training and being more mindful about my daily habits.
Mindfulness and Fun: It was a wake-up call to balance productivity with enjoyment. My future self reminded me to work hard, take time for fun, and be mindful.
Financial Wisdom: Seeing the potential regret over impulsive purchases has made me more thoughtful about my spending. Now, I'm more focused on investing in meaningful experiences rather than accumulating things.
Long-term Planning: It’s encouraged me to think ahead and make decisions that will benefit me in the long run.

Sidenote: How Old Should Your Future Self Be?

How far into the future should you project? That’s up to you. I chose age 80—17 years from now. Alternatively, as Hershfield suggests, think in smaller units if that feels more manageable. I played around with an online date calculator to add up the days between Current Self and Future Self.

Join the Conversation with Others

We’re excited to explore this exercise at our upcoming Gathering of In-Betweeners. If you’re a woman in your sixties or thereabouts, join us for a lively conversation between Current You and Future You. Visit the Services Section to sign up for the free event! I’d love to hear your thoughts and experiences—comment below to share what you’re learning about your current and future self.

Final Thoughts and Next Steps

Ready to bridge the gap between Current You and Future You? To truly connect with your future self, take these steps today. Write your letters, reflect on them, and consider joining our Gathering of In-Betweeners for a supportive community experience. Sign up through the Services Section and take the first step towards a more connected future.

As explained by Hal Hershfield in Your Future Self. Those who prefer podcasts can listen to his interview on the Hidden Brain.

Dear Future Me: Lessons for Today from Tomorrow (+Why This Will Change How You Live Your Life )