A Gathering of Small Joys: Cultivating Everyday Happiness
I’ve been absolutely inspired by our Gathering Community lately. Our recent discussion explored the idea of "Small Joys” that make for a Big Life. What I've taken away from our conversations feels like a recipe for joy, aligning perfectly with research in Positive Psychology, particularly the concept of "savoring." Let me share some insights from our Gathering and give you a taste of the science behind savoring.
Ingredients of Small Joy: The Recipe for Happiness
Think of it as a blend of attentiveness, intentionality, and slowing down to savor life's flavors. It's about being hyper-specific, breaking down moments of pleasure into small, delectable components.
Take, for instance, one participant's experience with the simple joy of singing in her church choir. As she described her participation, it became evident that her joy stemmed not just from the music itself but from the infectious enthusiasm of the choir director, the physicality of singing intensely, and the sense of belonging within a community that understood her need for connection without small talk. It’s a reminder that true joy often lies in the details.
The Multiplier Effect of Joy: Spreading Happiness
Just as negativity can be contagious, so too can joy. One member explained how another’s sheer delight in introducing her new puppy became a shared experience, spreading through our group. It’s a beautiful reminder of the interconnectedness of joy, how witnessing someone else's happiness can ignite our own.
This process brings to mind the lesson from the Disney Movie Monsters, Inc., where the monsters hide under the bed to scare the kids so that the monsters can capture the children’s screams. These screams become the energy source for the monster world. In the end, it turns out that kids’ laughter has much more fuel power than the screams. If we can capture and share each other's joy, it becomes an energy source for all.
Savoring the Present: Finding Sweetness in the Now
In our Gathering, I presented the research on the intervention of “savoring,” which emphasizes three key elements: reminiscence of past enjoyable events, attentiveness to the present moment, and anticipation of future joy. It's about relishing every drop of happiness, whether it's a cherished memory, a fleeting moment of contentment, or the excitement of what's to come.
As Sonja Lyubomirsky's research suggests (*The How of Happiness*), those who are mindful of their present experiences tend to lead more fulfilling lives, characterized by frequent bursts of positivity, a sense of competency, and strong social connections.
The Ripple Effect of Joy: Creating a Big Life with Small Joys
The impact of our discussions extends far beyond our virtual Gatherings. Just days later, one participant shared an encounter with a joyful child, a moment that resonated with our conversations. It’s a testament to the multiplier effect of joy, the power of savoring each moment, and the potential for even the smallest joys to transform our lives.
Instead of fixating on monumental highs or being overwhelmed by the world's woes, let's focus on cultivating attentiveness to joy in our everyday lives. Let's break it down into its most minor, most potent components and become flashlights of joy for others.
Elevate Your Everyday Joy
Curious about the insights we discussed? Drop me a DM, and I’ll share the handout from our Gathering. Ready to experience the magic firsthand? Sign up for our April conversation on my website. It’s free, and the connections and conversations are guaranteed to uplift and inspire. Join us in finding ways to craft a life filled with happiness as we age.